YOU DON'T NEED A TOXIC BOMB TO STOP UNDERARM ODOR

Underarm odor. Now, that's a touchy subject.  And one that we've been taught to deal with by using the "right product."

Most of us women were told to begin using a store-bought deodorant when we reached puberty. It was a rite of passage, just like the introduction to sanitary pads (back-in-the-day) or tampons, more recently.

Times have changed.

Of course, we’re still concerned - most of us, anyway - with the possibility of offending someone with our potentially strong underarm odor. But, great news has been withheld from us for too long. We don't need a toxic bomb to stop the stench, and that’s what most commercially sold deodorants are. While the industrial DEO situation is grim, we can fight back by tackling our underarm odor naturally.

We don't need those commercial personal products that have so many harmful chemicals in them. We have the right to choose what we put on our skin. And it's about time we exercised that right. The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) doesn't do much about the safety of personal care products and cosmetics. In the European Union, there are well over a thousand banned chemicals in personal products while in the USA, there are ten or so.

While most conventional antiperspirants work well, they are really a chemical overkill with numerous harsh and cancer causing substances - beginning with aluminum, parabens and chemical fragrances. Just read the scary ingredients printed on the labels of the store-bought deodorants. Those DEOs are bad news because whatever we put on our skin - anywhere on our beautiful bods - ends up in the bloodstream and then moves into our organs.

We can start our healthy - and sweet smelling - hygiene by eating a good diet,  drinking enough filtered water and taking a daily shower. That definitely cuts down on body odor. But, sadly, for many, it's not enough.  Luckily, for those of us who long for natural options, there is a way. We can make our own healthy deodorant.

Natural DEO is easy to make.

I demanded healthy armpits and found a recipe that absolutely beats B.O. And I have been using it for about as long as I can remember - with no major slip-ups - even during hot, stressed out and sweaty days.

This DEO offers a lot. It’s effective, non-toxic, costs only a few pennies, and has no wasteful packaging. (And, in my opinion, it’s awesome to have happy armpits and, at the same time, wield a blow to harmful consumerism.)

The best part is that it's made up of things that probably are already in your kitchen. These things go into your food. And, if it's found in good, healthy food, it's got to be the same when spread out over your skin.

Healthy Homemade DEO
3 Tablespoons Coconut Oil - organic is best

1 Tablespoon Baking Soda

3 Tablespoons Cornstarch - organic is best

Essential Oils (optional)

Small glass jar - recycled is best.

Just stir up everything in a bowl with a fork or spatula and transfer it into the jar. Then, take a small amount on your fingers and apply it to your underarms. It dries right away. And, like most commercial DEO's, it's best used once or twice daily, according to your needs.

This DEO works. The baking soda stops odor, the cornstarch absorbs moisture, and the coconut oil makes it stick together and offers antiseptic properties. Essential oils help it smell nice. You’ll be ever so pleased with this made-healthy-at-home DEO.

And, hey, just a few decades ago it was common to apply a deodorant cream. We can do that again, if that's what it takes to avoid harmful chemicals.

There are only two warnings that I can think of for your natural DEO. First one - try it first on a small area of your skin - to test for some kind of (highly unlikely) allergy. Second one - it's probably best to use up each batch within a calendar month.

Keep your homemade DEO at room temperature for easy application. If it gets too gooey (something that can happen in hot weather), leave it in the refrigerator between uses. You'll find that it won't be shockingly cold by the time you put it on your fingers. Another way to tackle the summertime goo problem is to add a bit more cornstarch - or small amount of beeswax - to the mixture.

YOU'RE MISSING SOMETHING IF YOU HAVEN’T TRIED INDIAN FRYBREAD

For those of you who've never eaten frybread along with a meal or as a dessert topped with honey or maple syrup, you've missed a real treat. And if you're not from the U.S. Southwest, where it's a cultural icon, perhaps you don't even know what Indian frybread is. Basically, frybread is an all-purpose flat bread that's served like biscuits in the East and South or tortillas in the Mexican American parts of the US. But frybread has its own tradition, rooted in Native American history, and is something so easy to prepare and so tasty that you might find yourself hooked on it. Now, that's not such a bad idea at all, especially, if calorie-counting is not on your agenda.


Frybread is a comfort food delight and so good for campfire evenings.

The history of this simple bread is both interesting and sad. It's widespread adoption among Native Americans happened in the mid 19th century. That's when the US government's policy of decimating and displacing tribes left the survivors in areas of the country that didn't have the rich natural resources that had been their heritage for thousands of years.

The U.S. government provided rations of flour, salt and lard and almost nothing else to those that made it through the struggles of forced marches and other travails to end up in reservations. Having so few food choices,  Native American women used what was available, and that's how frybread became a staple food. It was originally baked wrapped around a stick over a campfire and only later became a skillet-cooked food. While the Navajos get most of the credit for popularizing frybread, this kind of flatbread was a common bread on many reservations throughout the U.S. Today, frybread has become a symbol of pan-Indian resilience and, as a cultural unity food, takes table-top honors at Indian powwows. But you don't have to be a powwow-goer to learn to make and enjoy this delicious flatbread.

Today, frybread doesn't usually keep people alive but is a savory addition to meals that gets raves when heaped with combinations of meat, beans, veggies and cheese. Some people call these variations: "Indian tacos." It also makes a wonderful dessert when topped with honey, maple syrup, or jam. Covered with powdered sugar, they taste a lot like cake doughnuts. And it's a great treat for young and old when the dough is wrapped on a stick and cooked over the campfire. Whatever it's uses, it's one of our U.S. ethnic and comfort foods that everyone should try.

And, for those who shy away from the use of lard, vegetable oils and butter make acceptable substitutes. Other potential ingredients include cornmeal, oats and an egg added to the wheat flour. And, however it's made or what it's purpose, frybread is a totally hands-on experience, with kneading as an essential part of the process. Here's a usual recipe.

How to make frybread (recipe is for approximately 10 saucer-sized, flatbread patties).

Ingredients
4 cups of unbleached white flour – OR -- 2 cups of white flour and 2 cups of whole wheat flour)
1 Tbs. baking powder
¾ - 1 tsp. salt
1 ½ cups warm water (2 Tbs. powdered milk can be added)
¾ -1 cup shortening, warmed to room temperature
Extra flour for the bread board and for hands

Directions
- Put flour in bowl, add dry ingredients. Stir.
- Mix in warm water to form dough.
- Cover hands in flour.
- Knead dough by hand until soft but not sticky. Cover with a cloth and let stand for 10-15 minutes.
- Shape dough into balls about 2 inches across then flatten them into rounds by patting and stretching the dough. Can also be rolled out on a board.
- Melt a quarter of a cup of shortening in frying pan. When the grease is hot, put just one or two dough patties - at a time - in pan. Fry one side till golden brown, then turn and fry the other. Continue frying, adding a bit more grease as needed, until all the patties are cooked.
- Patties may be drained briefly on a paper towel. Best if served right away.

THE VERY PRACTICAL AND HARD TO FIND "DICKIE"

Do you ever remember wearing old-fashioned, heavy winter clothes? If you’re at least 60 years old, you probably do. If you're less than 50 years old, what with central heat and one or more cars in every driveway, you may not have even needed it - unless, of course, you were headed for the ski slopes. But back-in-the-day, layering was a must for winter health and not a fashion statement. You started with underwear - both tops and bottoms - and from there several more layers of wool knits were layered in addition to a long jacket or overcoat. And I'm talking about all kinds of winter clothing items (knit caps, leg warmers, neck cozys, mittens, wool socks, gaitors, etc.). All that was a fact of life, at least in the first part of the 20th Century. So, now to our topic. When I was a little girl, in the winter cold, years before houses became energy-hog McMansions, many children and some precautious adults wore dickies (also spelled "dickeys") – false shirt fronts - under their shirts or blouses to give them added warmth. We don't see dickies as everyday clothing any more. But they're still useful and easy enough to knit.

As children, when we asked why we had to wear a dickie, we were told that that they kept us from getting chest colds. Knitted dickies keep your neck and upper chest protected from icy drafts without having the bother of wearing a full turtleneck sweater. Antibiotics weren’t available back then, and a bad winter cold could complicate and be fatal. So, the tradition was to put on a lot of clothes in winter, both day and night.

Now, dickies don't tuck in anywhere and just hang from the neck. They’re made to sit mostly flat, like bibs, so that they don’t bulge under outer clothing.There are many styles for dickies including mock turtlenecks, turtlenecks, and collared dickies. My sister and I each had several so that they could be washed. Mom knew that dickies were better than scarves for children because they weren't easy to take off and, therefore, not so likely to left some place and lost. Also Mom didn't have an automatic washer until my last years of grade school - so, having several of any necessary item was a good idea.


My inspiration
But, returning to the first statement above, it’s the truth that you can’t find a lot of those old, heavy winter clothes, at least without a major search and with amazingly high price-tags. And that’s the story with the dickies. Cold weather is just around the bend, and I know I’ll enjoy a dickie both in my often drafty house and outdoors. So, with just a bit of effort, I knitted up a first dickie. It took only one weekend. You can make one, too, and you don’t need a really detailed pattern, once you understand how to do it. But I'll share with you the simple pattern I used. It only takes about 4 ounces of yarn – a soft wool and polyester blend is the most comfortable and totally washable with the rest of your clothes. I think this is a nice pattern for beginners, and you can finish it in just a few hours if you know how to knit in stockinette and rib stitch. It's also a fast to make, last-minute gift.

Pattern for a dickie (one-size for adults)
The back and front of this pattern are the same. The collar begins just at the shoulder without any shaping.  The depth of the collar is about 3" deep. I prefer this short collar because it’s more comfortable. (You can make a longer collar that’s 4”-6” deep, if you want to fold it over as a turtle-neck.)

The front and back length is 9". Anything shorter than that will not cover the upper chest and may even tend to ride up some. The bib width is 11".

Use US 10.5 needles for bibs and US 9 needles for collar.

The dickie is knit in 2 pieces and sewn together. Use a heavy worsted weight yarn or 2 strands of a sport weight yarn in the same or coordinating colors. For comfort, choose a very soft-feeling yarn.

Bibs: Stockinette: K one row, P the next. Begin and end all K rows with P 3. This creates the outside “trim.”

Collar: Rib: K 2, P 2, all rows.

Back: Loosely, cast on 40 stitches with the size 10.5 needle. Take the size 9 needles. Rows one to six – purl. Then change to size 10.5 needles and continue knitting with stockinette stitch - starting with a knit row, remembering to purl the 3 outside "trim" stitches. When the piece measures 9”, bind off 5 stitches for the shoulder at the beginning of 2 rows (both sides). Start the collar with a knit row on the wrong side.  Continue with the collar in rib stitch (size 9 needles), and when the collar measures 3”, bind off all stitches loosely (as if to knit on the wrong side, using the size 10.5 needles). 

Front: Knit just like the back.

Place right sides together and sew shoulder and collar seams. Weave in all loose pieces of yarn on the wrong side.

Note: This pattern is really for women (approx. 22" head circumference). Some people will need a wider bib and collar. You can just add the extra stitches you think you'll need for a larger person. The pattern is so simple that it's hard to do it wrong.

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BREAD PUDDING, AN APPALACHIAN AND SOUTHERN DESSERT THAT YOU'RE SURE TO ENJOY.

Like nearly everyone else, my husband and I sometimes crave a dessert. Of course, we feel that we should refuse to go along with that urge – at least most of the time. As we all know, excess sugar in the diet brings on problems like: weight gain, skin and hair problems, and even more serious conditions such as diabetes and lowered resistance to infections. But, from time-to-time, something a little sweet is next to irresistible. And since almost no one wants to totally abstain from desserts, what I recommend is a healthy change toward the not-so-sweet side of things. That's where bread pudding comes in.

Bread pudding is a tasty use for stale bread that has been in style for centuries. Along with bread pudding, cooks also used dry bread to make stuffing, thickeners and edible serving containers. Today, bread pudding may not be as common as it once was, but it’s never gone out of style in Appalachian and Southern states and also continues to be popular in Mexico, Great Britain, Belgium and France. For a lot of us, it's still one of our favorite comfort foods, helping us remember a time in the past when dessert was usually made from common kitchen ingredients and wastefulness was considered a terrible wrong.

In our home, we eat a lot of fruit, flavored yogurt, nuts, and granola, and that usually satisfies our dessert cravings. But when a dessert is definitely called for, usually for a holiday celebration or a special dinner with family or friends, I like to make something that's a fitting following to a good meal. Often that "something" is bread pudding. So, if you're also looking for  a dessert that's not too sweet, bread pudding is great dish that sure to please. Besides that, it gives you a use for stale bread, a situation that often occurs near the end of the week. (I usually just chop it up into coarse crumbs and freeze it. Later I make bread pudding or add it to my "almost- meatless meat-loaf". See related post below.)

The sweet alternative for leftover bread is to make old-fashioned bread pudding - not too sugary and plump with raisins with a hint of cinnamon and nutmeg, served up cold or warm out of the oven. And it can be made from any type of bread (whole wheat, white, multigrain, etc.) Homemade bread usually goes fast, but if you have any leftover, it makes really great tasting bread pudding. And, your dessert will look particularly festive if you serve it up in glass custard cups with a bit of syrup or whipped cream and a sprinkling of cinnamon on top.

Whatever reason you have for making and serving bread pudding, you can be sure it's a truly satisfying and eco-friendly treat.

Old-fashion bread pudding recipe

Here's a version of old fashioned bread pudding that’s as close as I can get to what my mother used to make.

Ingredients

2 cups of heated milk
4 cups of dry bread, torn in pieces

1/4 cup melted butter

1/2-cup brown sugar or honey
2 eggs, slightly beaten
1/3 cup seeded raisins or chopped dates
1 tsp. vanilla
1 tsp. cinnamon
Dash of nutmeg

Instructions

- Put bread and raisins in large bowl. Heat milk and 1/4 cup melted butter in a saucepan. Pour warm mixture over bread; let stand 10 minutes.

- Stir in all remaining pudding ingredients. Pour into a greased casserole pan.

- Bake at 350 degrees F for 30 to 40 minutes, or until a knife inserted into the center comes out clean.

Notes

Added to the basic recipe, you can include any of the following: fresh fruit cut up, minced nuts, a sweet liquor added in place of all or part of the milk, or a topping of honey, maple syrup, or confectioners sugar. If you’re going to put something sugary on top of your bread pudding, cut back some on the brown sugar in pudding.

If your bread pudding tends to dry out in the oven,  place a bowl of water on another shelf while the pudding bakes. This keeps delicate foods, like this bread pudding, from burning, drying out, or curdling. Check the water level during the baking time and add more hot water as necessary.

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A FRAMED PICTURE COLLAGE MAKES AN EYE-CATCHING WALL DISPLAY

Do you have an empty wall that really needs something to dress it up with? A picture collage display is an easy way to spruce up a wall without a total redo involving paint or wallpaper. Your picture frame collage lets you mix and match photos of your pics with family and friends pics and special moments in an organized way. And it works well for a formal living room, a hallway, a bedroom or just about anywhere is the house.

There’s always some wall in the house that could use a brightener, and a photo frame collage has the design impact you’re looking for. A collage of framed photos can also be a wonderful gift to celebrate an anniversary, birthday or any other special occasion. When planning to do any photo collage, first decide on the general theme for the display. Whether it’s to capture a moment in time or to create a visual archive, a collage of your own photos and frames will be your original creation. It’s entirely affordable and you are guaranteed a unique item for your wall or for gift giving.

Consider doing a photo collage for a dear child or multiple ones for all your special children. As parents and grandparents, we want to create a highly positive environment for our children and show them all our love and emotional support. One way to do that is by creating a “Loving Wall Display” for your children. It can contain pictures of family members, close school friends, teachers, and others interacting with the children. The pics can show special occasions or just capture the warmth of being together in an every day moment. This kind of display lets a  child know how many people believe in them, thus promoting their self-esteem.

The inspiration for my photo wall display

Just recently, I noticed that my bedroom walls were a little bare. Of course, I am (or try to be) something of a minimalist. Nevertheless, I thought that a colorful wall display would look good over my plain wood headboard. And having one or two things on the wall isn’t such a far stretch for minimalism, at least as far as I know.  But I wanted my wall decoration to have impact. That meant bigger rather than smaller. As usual, one of my concerns was how much I could possibly spend in materials. Being budget-wise is a high priority of mine – and only a little behind being Earth-friendly. So, I decided to try to make a collage of picture frames and photos that would be a bright addition to one of my bedroom walls.

Now, of course, I wanted my wall display to be something creative and personal, a bit different than most of the commercial picture collage displays and certainly more colorful. My overall design, as you can see, was a montage of four wood frames painted white and super glued together, to create the look of one “piece of art”. (See update note below.)

I’ve rather arbitrarily decided that my efforts at home accessorizing can’t be more than $25 a project. So I went to the thrift store and bought three wood picture frames with glass fronts. (I already had one at home awaiting a new project. The materials and costs of my project were: $15 total for the 3 frames, white spray paint to make all the frames white - $3 at a big box store, four colorful mats on sale at the craft store –$ 8, and black and white prints of 4 special photos that I’d been saving back. The photos were all interesting landscapes from a recent vacation trip that my husband and I made to New Mexico. To get the “look” fast and do it on-the-cheap, I just resized and ink-jet printed the photos as black and whites on good grade office paper. Later on, with a bit more money in my pocket (I’m nothing if not optimistic), I’ll upgrade my landscapes with commercial photo prints.

How to get started with your photo/frame collage

Find a few picture frames in similar or different materials. It doesn’t matter. The frames might be simple black wood frames, white frames or even colors and/or polished metal frames or some combination if you like a bold look. Different frame sizes will create more visual interest. And if your pictures are matted, you can make the display more fun by using colored mats or by writing dates or comments on them.

To get started, gather all your cherished photos and select the ones you want to display. In a minimalist or modern setting, black and white photos have dramatic appeal. Keep in mind the scale of each photo, and try to keep things similar – very small photos tend to get lost next to large ones. Stick to a color pallet for frames – all colors in a coordinated scheme (soothing feeling) or contrasting colors (dramatic mood) or black and white or monochrome (artsy look). If your photo collage is all black and white or sepia photos, you can paint the frames or use mats in vivid or muted colors. But if your mats are in different colors, it's best to have all the frames the same color.  You want the collage to feel like one art piece, not a confused collection of things that you can’t focus on, even when you try.

Once you chosen a few of your favorite photos, you’re ready to convert them into a beautiful wall display. Continue by laying out your frames and photos on the floor. Measure out the wall area that you are planning to use for your project. Your collage will have more design pizzazz if you make a tiny, almost invisible, pencil line through the middle of the collage and work your way up and down from it. By playing around with different configurations, you’ll find some arrangement that pleases you. Try to keep the frames no more than 2 inches apart so that they all "speak to each other" (or do like I did and super glue the frames together). Remember to edit your work. Less is often more - of what you’re looking for. Ask for somebody else’s opinion of what you’ve done. Once you’re sure of your selection, take a digital photo of the layout. That way you'll be sure to transfer your “perfect” arrangement” to the wall. Hang your collage frames with two nails or screws instead of just one and use a level to make lines that guide your picture hangings. You’ll be pleased to put up your collage, knowing that your unique “art work’ will be enjoyed for many months or even years. Your framed picture collage will keep some sweet memories close to your heart and give you many moments of pleasure. Update your collage by frame moves (if they're not glued together) or photo changes whenever you choose And once you start making framed collages, you’ll find plenty of reasons to make more for your home and as gifts for family and friends.

Update notes (8-20-11)

My husband really liked the collage and ask me if we could put it up in the living room. I somewhat reluctantly agreed to the venue change. As it turned out, the collage as described above, turned out to be too very heavy.  My husband said that my project could only be hung up as four separate frames, and I followed his advice (since he's the official wall display hanger at our house). I kept to the same general design but left about two inches between the frames. So, if you want to try to super glue some frames together, they probably should be somewhat smaller than those shown in the illustration and have plastic in the front instead of glass. 

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PICKLING, A TREASURED WAY TO PROCESS VEGGIE ABUNDANCE

Some pickled dishes - What they are and why you should make them.
It's getting close to summer, officially. That means that a lot of us will soon have bumper crops of certain vegetables, and the question often comes up: "Is there something that I can do with all these cucumbers, beans, peppers, etc.? Even, for those of us without a super-garden production, we sometimes have too many vegetables left in the fridge at the end of week. No one wants to throw them out, of course.

Jonathan Bloom in his book, “American Wasteland: How America Throws Away Nearly Half of Its Food” (2010), estimates that a quarter of the food that’s brought into U.S. kitchens is scraped off plates, uneaten after meals or never even served up and sent directly to the trash. The idea of wasting so much food really troubles me, especially when current headlines are predicting a world of increasing food costs and shortages. So, this post is about something that you can do - when you don't know what to do - with all those extra veggies. In the spirit of: ‘When you have too many lemons, make lemonade”, there is this variation:” When you have too many vegetables, make pickles.”

Pickles and relishes are briny and vinegary, seasoned vegetables. Vinegar is the miracle ingredient that acts as a preservative. Olive oil does the same thing. Pickling has been a means of preserving and flavoring vegetables, surely dating back to prehistoric times. Archeological evidence indicates the ancient Mesopotamians pickled, and pickles are mentioned in the Old Testament. And history books tell that European explorers to America carried pickles with them on the ships. Pickled vegetables were the means by which 15th-century sailors saved themselves from scurvy and, in the early colonies, they were among the first food items to be produced commercially.

In some other countries, they’re known as giardiniera, ensalada de legumbres en escabeche, chutneys, misodzuke, etc. While there may be variation and even disagreement over procedures, all of these dishes are about the same - a mix of marinated vegetables.  Served traditionally as embellishments for roast meats and beans, nowadays, pickled vegetables  are considered to be great combined with salad greens, side dishes in themselves, or healthy snacks when served up with a few crackers. When pickled as as colorful vegetable medleys, they are decorative, too, and are well accepted on buffet tables along with more “elegant” foods.

So, now we come to two topics that are worthy of note: piccalilli and chow-chow. These are regional names, at least in Appalachia, for vinegary vegetables with spices.  Both chow chow and piccalilli are vegetable mixtures that can include a mix of cauliflower, peppers, onion, cabbage, green beans, etc., along with spices, all depending on the cook’s preference or veggie surplus at the moment. WV, my home state, has long had its own regional food variety – Appalachian or Southern Mountain style. To the best of my memory, the WV choice among garnishes was piccalilli. It's made with several different coarsely chopped veggies and almost always has cauliflower or cabbage. On the other hand, what we called chow-chow was certainly known, but seems, at least in my experience, to have been more popular in the Deep South. Chow chow is a relish with a base of chopped green tomatoes. It may also include onions, bell peppers, and other vegetables, and is usually more finely chopped than piccalilli. While not exactly similar, the terms, piccalilli and chow-chow, are sometimes used interchangeably.

My early memories of eating pickled veggies
Now, my close family was all city folk, and the veggies to make our pickled dishes – and a lot of our prepared garnishes, too - were “imported" from farms where my great uncles and aunts continued to live on. And we sometimes had pickled veggies, usually piccalilli, on the table. It was served on the side of a plate. But as a small child, I found pickled foods to be too vinegary for me. Some years later, entering preadolescence, I developed a taste for piccalilli. Actually, I liked it a lot and could have eaten it with every meal, but that didn't happen, at least not for more than a day or so, because my family also liked and ate quantities of it. (For whatever reasons, I never really liked the versions of chow-chow that I was served, with all due apologies to chow-chow fans.)

Also back then, when I was growing up, we usually had the Sunday family dinner at my Dad’s mother’s house. We called her Mawmaw. As often as not, at these meals, Mawmaw served the family - with 10 or more "regulars" in attendance - two or more different meats and four or more side dishes, including pickled dishes, besides rolls, cornbread, several desserts, etc. (It was an eating marathon, and most of the adults, at least, had the expanded waistlines to show for it.) I believe she made most of the pickled dishes herself, but maybe she also had a supply of jars from our “still on the farm” relatives. Piccalilli, chow-chow, pickled beets and pickled eggs were all highly praised traditions at her house.

We sometimes had these same garnishes at our house, too, but other than pickled beets, I don't remember Mom making them. It was Dad who brought them in. I guess Mawmaw shared with us occasionally.  At home, sometimes pickled vegetables were served at breakfast time with biscuits and sausage or bacon gravy – what our family called “poor man’s” gravy.  At lunch or dinner, too, they were sometimes served with pinto beans and cornbread. While few of our home-served meals could be described as elegant, the presence of piccalilli or chow chow gave the meals a certain spirit of abundance - at least that’s what it seemed to me as a child.

Other early memories of eating pickled veggies were at large gatherings and picnics in the summer time. At least once a year, we traveled 20 or more miles, "up the river" to a park or church grounds where we met with 40 or more family members – most of whom I hardly knew. Also, back then, the best cooks were known for their “secret” recipes for piccalilli and chow-chow, and there were even competitions for these foods at county fairs. They also sold quart bottles of them at the fairgrounds and gave away samples to anyone who came by. I often reminisce about the large-scale picnics and county fairs of my childhood and, of course, the foods that we enjoyed at these events. It brings back some wonderful memories!

Would you like to make some piccalilli?
Now, maybe you remember those old-fashioned pickled vegetables from traditional recipes, and some of you probably still prepare them. But other people never really liked eating them because they were too vinegary - also, sometimes too salty. But here’s good news. There are other ways of making piccalilli, at least, that taste great and aren’t so acid or briny. So, if you still haven’t already learned to love pickled veggies, try out this recipe. I bet that you and your family will love this side dish as much as my husband and I do.

The pickled veggies recipe I’m talking about here is a “quickie” one that can be eaten after two days. Some people might argue that these aren't technically pickles because they aren’t particularly salty and don’t have a shelf life of an entire year. But, they are a version of the same that doesn’t call for the fuss of standard canning procedures. And this piccalilli is a nice balance of crunchy, sour and a touch of sweetness. And when salad greens would long be eaten up  - or heaven forbid, thrown out - these pickled vegetables are still at their best – lasting in the fridge for up to a month. These pickled veggies along with a slab of good bread, a bowl of beans (and maybe some farmers' cheese) make for a complete meal. 

Piccalilli, A Lighter Version
Veggies, chopped coarsely
2 carrots, peeled
1 celery stalk
3 c. cauliflower
1 sweet pepper, red or green
2 c. zucchini or yellow squashes
1 red onion (better sliced than chopped)

Pickling liquid
2 garlic cloves, sliced
1 c. apple cider vinegar
1 c. dry white wine
¼ c. olive oil
1/2 c. water
3 tps brown sugar
2 tsp salt
4 peppercorns
1 tsp dry dill weed
½ tsp mustard seed
2 jalapenos (seeds removed) or 2 banana peppers

Place the pickling ingredients in a 1-gallon stainless steel or enameled pot and bring the pot to a boil. Boil for 15 minutes. Strain the liquid and return to pot. Keep the liquid boiling and add successively: carrots and celery, cauliflower, peppers, onion slices and squash, leaving 2-3 minutes between additions of each vegetable. When you consider all the veggies to be lightly cooked, - still crisp and crunchy, rather than limp and rubbery - remove them from liquid and let them cool at room temperature. Once cooled, put the vegetables in a sterilized, 1-gallon glass pickle or olive jar. Fill the jar with the - now also cooled - pickling liquid. Cover with a sterilized lid and refrigerate for 2 days before eating. Keep it refrigerated for up to a month -  I’m fairly sure that your prized piccalilli will disappear a lot faster than that.

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YOU MIGHT LEARN TO LIKE SALT-RISING BREAD.

Why did (do) people make this stinky bread?
Salt-rising bread, or salt-risen bread, is an old-fashioned, crusty white bread that develops its unusual flavor from the fermentation of grain. No yeast or other type of leavening is necessary. A particular feature of this bread is that it rises with salt-tolerant bacteria. The starter (rising) is exposed to the air until bacteria fall into it, causing fermentation and letting off a stinky yoghurt or cheese-smelling gas. The bread is baked like other regular, yeast-raised bread, but the preparation time is much longer due to its fermentation process. The finished product has a finer texture than regular bread, and the s-r odor is just perceptable.

Thought to be European of origin, s-r bread was common in United States from the early 1800s. It was immensely popular in West Virginia, Kentucky, Ohio, Michigan, Pennsylania, New York (and probably elsewhere). During both the 18th and 19th centuries, in those states, s-r bread was the most popular kind of breads along with (soda-leavened) cornbread and bisquets.

The most likely reason for its early popularity was that people lived in rather isolated communities and yeast was often in short supply and expensive. (Baking powder, a factory-made product that was not produced in the U.S. until 1850.) In the late 19th century, what with increasing industrialization and better transportation systems, s-r became only one choice among many great breads. Since the process was not easy and the odor strong,  in more recent years, almost all home-baked bread is made with yeast. S-r bread continues to be made in local, specialty bakeries, but today it's all but a lost art.

A family story about s-r bread
You may be thinking, if it stinks a lot and takes almost a full day to prepare, why would anyone want to continue with this tradition? Well, according to those who like it, it’s worth all the labor and even more. My Dad and my grandmother (we called her Mawmaw) swore that it was the most delicious of all breads. I remember that Dad considered it a real "find" when he ran into it, and, without any help, could eat half a loaf, served hot with butter. Even so, I don’t think that Mawmaw made it very often, and our usual source of s-r bread was a local bakery.

As far as my other childhood memories go, my Mom was not as thrilled as Dad to eat s-r bread and didn’t make it herself. On the other hand, I never noticed her refusing it. I liked it pretty well and joined in eating it, although sometimes I held my nose. I consulted with my sister on this subject and she remembered it being eaten in our home but not much else about it. She said she didn’t remember the taste at all and wondered if it ever got past her nose. (Children, of course, have a much better sense of sense of smell than their elders.)

By the way, back then, I was told, and am almost sure it’s true, that this bread should be eaten the same day it’s made because it tends to get rock-hard by the second day. (You can use hard bread to make bread cubes or crumbs.) On the other hand, I don’t ever remember a time when we didn’t eat it all, greedily, within a few hours of its appearance in our home.

If you’re willing to do some work, try making s-r bread
Here's your chance to carry on a long-standing tradition by learning to make s-r bread. To get you started, I’m passing on a recipe for this valuable piece of our heritage. So, this post is for all of you convinced, from-scratch cooks, like GrandmaS, who are eager to try out recipes for good food that don’t call for a lot of industrial products. I hope you’ll join me making s-r bread, and that its unique aroma and excellent taste will continue in the kitchens of future generations.

This kind of bread takes dedication and a lot of patience, taking from start to finish: eight or more hours overnight for the starter and from four to six hours (or more) for dough preparation the next day. I’m sorry to say I can’t duplicate Mawmaw's recipe for s-r bread. The fact is she never consulted recipes when she baked any kind of bread, at least I never saw her do it. If she left notes behind about her s-r bread, I never heard of any. So, I’ll tell you how I make sr-bread. It’s a combination of recipes from those that I found in several different cookbooks and cooking blogs.

Recipe for SALT RISING BREAD
To get the rising (starter) going, put 3 tablespoonfuls of sifted, corn meal in a large glass or crockery bowl. Pour a cup of boiling water over the cornmeal and stir it. Quickly add a cup of cold water so that the liquid is hot to the touch but not scalding. Then add ½ teaspoonful of salt, a pinch of soda, and a teaspoon of sugar. You may place a sliced white potato in the cornmeal water. Some cooks can get their rising to happen with only the potato and don’t need to use any soda at all. The potato, if used, is removed in the morning.

Set the mixture with a cloth on top on the back of the stove or in the oven with the pilot light lit, or anywhere else that will be warm all night – between 80 and 110 degrees. (I use my rice cooker – no lid - on the warm setting with a small plate under the bowl.) In the morning and after at least 8 hours, check to make sure the rising is frothy and has the unique s-r odor. (It should have no particular color. If blue or red strings appear, spoiling has occurred and the rising must be thrown out). Don't make more rising than you think you'll use the next day because, refrigerated or not, it doesn't keep.

In another big bowl, pour the rising and add enough lukewarm milk or water to make a full 2 cups. Add 1 teaspoon of salt, 1/3 cup of shortening, and 7 cups of flour. Knead everything together. Keep the mixture in a warm place until it has again doubled. Push it down, divide the dough in half (2 loaves), and place each half in a rectangular baking tin. Allow the dough to rise in the tins until doubled. Then bake at 350 F for about 50 minutes or until cooked through with a golden crust. Serve hot with butter or margarine and jam.

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"HELLO, HELLO. ARE YOU THERE?"

Phone calls were important.
Looking back sixty or so years ago, telephones in the US were used mostly by businesses, and only the affluent were sure to have a home phone. Growing up, where I came from, "regular" people typically used a pay phone and did so only when a call was deemed important. If some family on the block actually had a phone, usually what they had was called a ”party-line” (often shared line by four or more families) and waits for a line were sometimes long. Relatives and neighbors often came over and asked to make a necessary call, and this gave them an excuse to stay and visit for a while.

By the mid-fifties, the private line telephones were popularized and soon the device was a household "must". Just about everyone was phoning everybody else. Family members had lengthy daily chats and made frequent calls to businesses for information, for appointments, or to have things like groceries and carryout foods delivered. And about that time, as I remember, it wasn't unusual for people to spend a couple of hours or more a day talking on the phone. One of the first items of information exchanged among workmates, classmates, and even the most casual acquaintances was: " What's your phone number?" And call they did - at any hour from 7 am to after 10 pm. Apparently, almost everybody was overjoyed to use the phone for all kinds of social interaction. We acted to a phone ring like Pavlov's dog - jumping up and scurrying. We dropped even the most important happenings in the home to answer the phone. It seems it was a sign of social importance to answer the home phone ten or more times a day, and all calls were answered with eagerness, if not urgency.

Gradual disenchantment with the telephone
Now this “in love with the phone” trend, continued for several decades. We talked often to friends and family and made numerous calls each day for information or to leave messages. If my memory is correct, that would have been up to the 1990’s. At about that time, the technology improved and caller ID and voicemail became widespread. At some point, most people stopped jumping up to answer every time the phone rang. (Undoubtedly, a lot of telephone dissatisfaction was related to the exponential increase in phone-sales calls.) They began to think, at least at times, that the device was obtrusive and remained seated at the dinner table or watching a favorite program, saying, " Let it go to voicemail." They checked their voicemail usually once or twice a day, and would return a call or not, depending on their judgment of its importance.

There was a fast re-enthrallment with phone conversations again around the turn of the present century as the cell phone began to be a “must” for people of all ages. Some people, and particularly teenagers, continue to be frequent cell phone users. The cell phone turned out to be handy, but what with major car wrecks while conversing and a potential brain cancer link, it's no wonder that a substantial fraction of the population has cut back on cell phone calls. Of course, the vendors of the phone technology were more than anxious to offer all kinds of other services – texts, email, games, music, Internet, etc. – and so the newer sorts of cell phones continued to find huge markets. Dialing a number for a conversation is only one of many options on the latest phones.

Now, more than a decade into the 21st century, a lot of people don’t pick up either their home or cell phone when it rings. And, some of us don't even listen to voicemail, except at work and then only if we’re instructed to. If you really want to speak to these people, you have to email first and set up an appointment for a phone conversation. Even the mere asking for a phone conversation may create certain hesitancies, if not embarrassment.

So, if we are no longer talking to people outside our homes by phone, how can we possibly hope to stay in touch? We still have contact, of course, but we do it another way by "more advanced” technology. And that technology is double-edge sword. It allows us to communicate but it takes away our "presence." Well, even the phone created some level of "disembodiment," as family and neighbors visited without the person-to-person dimension. But, at least, the phone allowed for a voice, which is a very special part of one’s physical self.

Who’s calling, please?
For lots of us, a phone call from a friend or a family member is an unusual event. Of course, we still love our family and friends, but it's the digital message - an email, a text, a tweet, a photo - and not the spoken word that is more likely to get through. Large sectors of the population don’t bother to have a home phone and just carry a cell phone. What's more, the youth excepted, a lot of us seldom use our cell phone for voice-to-voice calls and just keep it for "emergencies" that could occur outside of the home. At home, we may have a computer phone instead of “land-line,” something that’s a lot less expensive than a regular telephone and has the advantage of portability. But, as communication initiators, we are just as likely to send a quick text or email as to actually "dial" a number. And as communication receivers, we would often rather read a quick message than to "bother" with a phone call that might extend itself more than we expect or otherwise take up our time with "extraneous" topics.

Like it or not, for the time being, the Internet and the cell phone text are our main communication methods at work and at home. And it’s clear, as well, that every hour of Internet time makes for even less time for face-to-face contact with other people. It seems that many of us have actually “traded in” most of our in-person interactions for Internet activities.  Beyond that, if most households continue to be made up of just one or two people and both with "busy" schedules, there might not be many opportunities to have a personal chat with anyone outside the workplace, where I presume some oral communication will continue to occur. But, then again, even in banks and offices, we’re often instructed to use the automated functions for both regular transactions and to “report” troubles. I'm reminded of a current TV commercial where two people are seated at a dining table facing each other, unspeaking, and sending their messages to one another via texts and email.

A scary panorama
Recently, I ran across a new book that sums up a frightening state of affairs. It’s called: The Lonely American: Drifting Apart in the Twenty-first Century by pyschologists Jacqueline Olds and Richard S. Schwartz. It’s a report about psych-patients who became so isolated that they stopped intiating contact, even with people who were the most important to them. Having shut off, or been shut off  from family and friends, they became increasingly morose and some were suicidal. The authors describe extreme personalities – the ones who underwent pschotherapy – but it’s their opinon that a large fraction of the US population suffers from some degree of isolation, either socially- or self-inflicted. And, speaking for a lot of us, who don’t consider ourselves candidates for psychotherapy, we still have to admit we are just plain lonely a good part of the time. Texts, email, blogs, and commenting on blogs help to fill up the void. But, in a nicer world, more of our waking hours would be filled with friendly, human voices.

Can you imagine a time in the future when most children wouldn’t learn oral communication skills? And, no, I’m not talking about abused or neglected children, but about the wider population. It might be quite enough for them to convey their needs and feelings in texts, email, and uploaded videos. Speech would tend to become a thing of the past - mostly left to lawyers, politicians, pundits, and other news reporters. Under those circumstances, witticisms, prose, poetry, and dramatic sequences might continue to blossom, but the warmth of a friendly voice, in-person or over the phone, would be an infrequent event. Is all this a fantasy or a look at the future. What do you think?

Other thoughts on the situation
A century or two ago, a lot of people lived long distances from a good part of their family and friends. Their main way of staying in touch was by letters and those could easily be months apart. On the other hand, back then, most people lived with, or close by, their large families so they really didn’t miss out on much human contact – in fact, some folks probably had more in-person dealings than they wanted. Nevertheless, many of them expressed sadness because of little communication with so many of their loved ones. One principal way they had to overcome this problem was through visiting. Visitors were few and far between, but when they did arrive, they tended to stay for periods of weeks or months.

Maybe, we should encourage some longer visits from people who are important to us, and in that way, assure ourselves more hours of much desired, face-to-face communication. In the meantime, and between visits, don’t be so hesitant to dial up loved ones and be ready to repeat the dialing (or send out advisory email) until they pick up the phone.

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WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON YOUR ECO-SABBATH?

A lot of us don’t keep much of a Sabbath. If we go to church on Sunday morning, we feel that we did our religious duty for that day. But, most everyone knows that the Sabbath is supposed to be, according to the Bible, a day of rest. Maybe, like many people, you don't feel like that Sunday is a special day, set apart from the other six days. But, wait! Here is a chance to celebrate an eco-Sabbath. It’s another way that we could be motivated to make one day of the week, a real day of rest. The eco-Sabbath can be a special time for you, alone or accompanied by friends and family, to thank God for another day of life and, at the same time, demonstrate your Earth-friendly convictions.

Now, most of us own-up to having a sizeable carbon footprint, which, sadly, amounts to having done our share of damage to the Earth. What’s more, we would like to see an end to the ghastly level of carbon emissions that we've all created. The question is: How can we go about doing something like that? Probably, you're not ready for a “no-impact” life or even a “no-impact” year, as was done and documented by Colin Beavan. But some of us should be able to try out a “no-impact”, 24-hour day.

So, what might our eco-Sabbath look like? It would clearly be a quiet day. On that day, we would make no purchases, not use any machines or anything electric, including computers, TVs or cell phones. That also means no cooking, either (unless it’s with a solar oven). And no transportation methods other than walking or biking. And we'd use as little water as possible - that being only the necessary for maintaining good health and minimal hygiene. How much water might that be? Well, I suppose each participant would need a gallon or so to drink and another gallon or so to wash up. (You notice I didn’t say shower.) And, maybe, we’d need two gallons of water for rinsing out dishes and another few gallons for toilet flushing (and that only when plainly needed).

O.K. That was the negative part – what we won’t be doing on our eco-Sabbath. So, what’s to be gained by going through all this? First of all, it's a perfect way to take some time from day-to-day work and other kinds of responsibilities and to rekindle your religious faith, while, simultaneously, giving our planet a break. By not using any resources for 24 hours, we can cut our carbon impact for the year by 1/365 or 0. 03%. Now, that may not sound like very much. But once we learn how to do this, there’s always a fair chance that it could be repeated. If we did this for one day a week for the whole year, our personal carbon emission would be reduced by some 14%. And, second and equally important, these hours, taken out from our normal routines, can help us think about ways to make our lives more Earth-friendly on a full-time basis.

And, here’s more of the positive part. There are many good things that a person can do well and thoroughly appreciate on an eco-Sabbath. You may remember a simpler time from your youth when on Sunday you went to church and spent the rest of the day visiting with family and friends, eating an unhurried "Sunday dinner", playing games, and singing songs around the piano. Back then, there was enough time to do things on Sundays that were totally different from our regular routines. How did so many of us lose that perspective on Sundays? An eco-Sabbath can be a reason to enjoy some of the same enjoyable (and low carbon-impact) activities with friends and family.

Beyond that, from my own viewpoint, I’ll try out my first eco-Sabbath in good weather. That way I’ll not need any home heating or fans. Also, the good weather should allow for plenty of sunlight, and I’ll be able to carry out all my activities with daylight. Oh, and there won’t be any electric usage for the refrigerator either. I’ll do my "no-impact" day just before I do my weekly grocery shopping and, so, it won’t be difficult to put the remaining items in an ice chest. (This will be a perfect time for me to clean the empty refrigerator, a task that I dislike and am known to put off.)

I can reduce my carbon footprint a bit more on eco-Sabbath by not using any products other than hand soap, dish soap or a laundry bar soap for washing out a clothing item or a towel. That also means no use of paper (other than toilet paper) and, certainly, no plastic products. I’ll probably use olive oil instead of my all-purpose skin cream. Olive oil works as well or better than most commercial skin creams – the only drawback to it is the cost – as price of olive oil has increased a lot lately. My food won’t be heated, but I can eat it cooled - directly from the ice chest - or at room temperature, picnic style.

For my part, I’m pretty sure that I can carry out an eco-Sabbath at least one day a month (that’s 3% of the year) without any suffering at all. On such days, I would be able to enjoy a leisurely conversation at the kitchen table with my husband and take a nice long walk, alone or with my husband (or with my dogs). I could also do some inspirational reading, draw or paint, work in my small garden, write in my journal, do needlework or yoga. I would surely benefit from getting up with the sun in the morning and going to bed early, allowing me at least 10 hours of sleep time. And that would be a really healthy start to the rest of my week.

Now, I've told you some of my ideas about how I'd celebrate a "no-impact" (or "low-carbon impact") Sabbath. What would your eco-Sabbath look like?

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IN PRAISE OF THE SIMPLE DISHRAG

My inspiration
Last night I woke up from a dream. I’m not sure if it was a bad or good dream, but the last thing I remember in the dream was seeing a stack of old-fashion, red and white cotton dishrags. I reached for the stack, grabbed what must have been 5 or 6, felt a great sense of satisfaction, and then woke up. Now, I’m not someone to over-interpret dreams, but I think I know why it was so important to me to get hold of those dishrags. It has to do  with both my past and my present. I have a lot of good memories about sharing tasks in the kitchen with my Mom and my sister. We washed a lot of dishes together and enjoyed doing things as a team. Somehow the humble dishrag must have become a symbol of family closeness and teamwork. As to my present and future, I'm constantly looking for more eco-friendly products to use in my home. Dishrags don't contaminate the environment. They work well, last a long time, and can be washed and dried with the rest of the household linens.

Stop using plastic scrubbers
Of course, that doesn’t mean that I hadn't recently thought about the virtues of the tried-and-true cotton dishrag. I just hadn’t acted on it. So, here’s my “greener” living challenge to all of us (myself included) – stop using plastic scrubbers. There are several good reasons for doing it. First of all, we need to convince ourselves that that we do not need to buy those funky, green plastic things all the time. We save money when we use natural scrubbers, over and over again. But, more important, each time we say no to throwaway plastics in the home, we are doing our part to lower our carbon footprint.

You’ve also probably heard that the average kitchen plastic dish scrubber contains more bacteria than a toilet bowl. Ugh! So, what do most people do when they hear that? They go out and buy the same product, more often – not a good idea, at all. Think about those millions of times each week (or month) that people buy these little items. Yes, they’re cheap – a dollar gets you 6 or 8 in a pack (at the dollar-store). But they’re made from oil and end up as non-degradable plastic in our landfills and waterways.

Beyond that, any scrubber that has a label for anti-bacterial properties is likely to contain triclosan, a particularly toxic chemical (first used as a pesticide), or something equally damaging when concentrated in the environment. But, the good news is that there are alternatives to plastic and pesticide soaked scrubbers. And, that’s the theme of this post – stop the contamination! Get rid of those plastic dish scrubbers, once and for all, and make the pledge to use only natural scrubbers.

One option – the cellulose sponge
We can purchase scrubbers that are made from cellulose fiber. The cellulose should be sourced from plantation forests or recycled. Read the label carefully because some cellulose sponges are covered with polyester, another type of plastic. For hygiene, it’s best to try to let sponges dry out between uses. To sterilize them, soak them for a couple of minutes in boiling water, microwave them for a minute or two, or easiest of all, just put them in your automatic dishwasher whenever you wash dishes and turn on the hot-heat, drying cycle. While cellulose sponges are natural and non-contaminating, they tend to break down over a period of weeks and have to be replaced. So, they may not be your best buy.

A better option – dishrags
You may remember - or not - the old-fashioned dishrag. Back when everyone washed dishes by hand (pre 1960’s, I believe), it was the almost universal rule to have a stash of loosely woven, cotton dishrags. They worked well and lasted for months, if not years. It seemed that they would never be replaced with any other product. But, what happened? We stopped using them because (perhaps) it seemed more modern to buy another plastic product (like all the rest of the plastic that was filling up our homes). Or, they disappeared because the cost of cotton went up too high for manufacturers to produce and sell them for less than a dollar each.

Maybe we can’t find the cotton dishrags very easily any more (or at a price we want to pay), but we can certainly make our own. As a knitter, I like to try making things that are useful in the home. Knitting dishrags is for me a way to fight consumerism and a part of my commitment to a “greener” life. If you make the scrubber change, you’ll always want to have two rags at the sink, one for washing dishes and one for wiping down surfaces. So, if you wash linens once a week, you’ll need 14 rags – fewer are needed, of course, if you wash more frequently.

Easy pattern for a knitted dishrag
Here's an easy pattern for a dishrag that you can knit up in an hour (or maybe two hours, if it’s the first time you’ve tried to do something like this).

You'll need worsted weight, cotton yarn. Leftover yarn is great, if you have some. (Personally, I like dishrags made with the two-color sequence yarns.) Plan on using about an ounce or so of yarn.

Needles, according to your choice. I like a loose-knitted dishrag so I'm using a size #9. This will give a finished size of about 6” y 6”.

Starting
Cast on 4 stitches
Row 1 - Knit 4

Increasing
Row 2 - Knit 2, yarn over, knit across the row.

Repeating
Row 2 until you have 44 stitches.

Decreasing
Row 3 - Knit 1, knit 2 together, yarn over, knit 2 together, knit to the end of the row.

Repeating
Row 3 until you have 4 stitches left on the needle.

Finishing
Bind off. Weave in ends.

(Note: This is a great first-knit project for children. The same pattern can also be a coverlet for a little doll's bed - it all depends on how you look at it.)

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TV SIT-COMS – PAST AND PRESENT

I just read a New York Times editorial that I want to comment on. The column is titled: “The Flock Comedies” and it’s written by DAVID BROOKS (October 21, 2010)

Family sit-coms throughout the years
David Brooks, the columnist, writes about the history of television sit-coms and how they've changed over the years. He calls what we used to watch and enjoy on TV, family situation comedies. Those sit-coms included Mom, Dad, and the children. They had a small cast of actors who represented lifelong relationships between family members and their good friends and neighbors. They worked their differences out because they had a great sense of responsibility and love for one another.

But times have changed and our TV sit-coms with them. We’ve moved from the old themes of “All in the Family” and “The Cosby Show”- featuring parents and kids - to newer shows based on one-generational happenings. Instead of seeing loving families, the new sit-coms often show tension or open conflict with family members and particularly with their parents' generation.

More recent sit-coms featuring the "flock"
Today, whether we like them much or not, we watch non-functional family comedies, based mainly on the “flock”. Brooks calls them flock comedies because they represent groups of loosely connected friends, mostly young or young-ish who live in proximity, but not necessarily together. Flock-friends don’t seem to accept much responsibility for themselves and much less for other people. Today’s shows highlight people who have the time to lounge around - homes, coffee shops, workplaces, even bars - exchanging the most light-hearted types of remarks, cynicisms, and quips. The underlying foundation of these comedies is “no-sweat-needed”. This says a lot about our "do-nothing" society - doing as little as possible to get by for yourself and even less for your family and neighbors.

The popularity of the more recent TV comedies reflects what has happened in our present-day society. Young people delay marriage until around 30 years and, during all those years between high school and marriage, most are outside of traditional families, creating a youthful tribe or "flock". Many other people get divorced after a very few years, and they, too, look for the “flock” to replace the close family attachments that no longer exist.

So, this flock-friendship mentality becomes the background for a new kind of comedy of manners. This trend began with ‘Seinfeld,’ ‘Friends,’ and ‘Sex and the City.’ Now we have ‘Desperate Housewives,’ ‘Glee,’ and ‘The Big Bang Theory.’ Instead of spending time with family and lifelong friends, these comedies, according to columnist Brooks, whirl around a kind of "friendship machine" - almost comic-strip chronicles of unrelated people, bonded together in intimate contact, but often demonstrating irresponsibilty with one another.

Since a lot of people don't want or haven't been able to experience total commitment, one-on-one, they prefer to live, or at least contemplate in their viewing hours, low-density networks featuring a large array of friends. These same people tend to avoid any kind of emotional proximity in their own lives because of fear - too often they've seen close relationships turn to anger and avoidance. For them, it's a lot easier to dwell on (and idealize) shallow and dispersed connections to a "flock". While aimed primarily at the youth - as is almost everything in our consumer-ridden mass media, the flock sit-coms also appeal to many older people who want to continue fantasizing about those early friendship-bonding experiences. It so happens that that these middle- and golden-agers, for any number of reasons, have never been able to replace the intensity of their early friendships (and romances) with successful marriages or good relationships with their children.

"Flock" mentality side-steps need for responsible relationships
The central point here is that the main-stream population a few decades ago or, at least, their former sit-com heroes, always had time for family and friends and a strong commitment to working out their differences. That's just not so, today - working people, singles and couples alike, have to be working two and more jobs (if they're lucky enough to find them) to pay the rent and put food on the table. There just isn't enough time to work through problems that arise with family and friends. Also, unfortunately, some unknown - but probably substantial - part of the population is incapable of dealing with life's real problems due to alcoholism and dependence on mood-changing substances, both legal and illegal. So, both youth and older folks turn more and more to substitute relationships in Facebook, Twitter networks, and other kinds of low-commitment interaction - trading temporary convenience for lifetime loyalty.

Frivolous group friendships don't seem to threaten us like more traditional societal values based on mutual responsibility. Low intensity relationships side-step the necessity of working through interpersonal problems and, sometimes, being forced to accept compromises. It's no wonder that today’s comedies are hollow. They parallel our other TV obsessions with violence, casual sex, confrontational politics, and highly biased news reporting. If we have any trace of traditional values left, then we need to understand that what's being fed to us through the mass media - conspired or not - is a lot of highly digested gibberish. The garbage being served-up is aimed at replacing real considerations about such topics as family life, common sense, and a commitment to making things work.

HAS HAVING GRAY HAIR BECOME CHIC? SOME THOUGHTS ABOUT IT.

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I have more than a touch of gray and I don’t dye my hair – haven’t for more than 4 years. Well, I’m happy with my choice, and here are my two cents in the dialog about going gray.

First of all, it’s clear that not all women would agree with me that going gray is O.K. I think that everyone has a right to an opinion about the subject. And, as to my reading of the different viewpoints out there, I see that they run a range from:
-- Going gray is fabulous and chic
-- Maybe acceptable in some circles (if somewhat grim).
-- God forbid! You’ll look like your own grandmother.
-- It may be your choice, but don’t expect everyone to like or respect you for it.

A bit of gray history
In all fairness on the subject, I decided to do a little researching about the process of graying. This is what I found out for sure:
1) Going gray is a natural part of aging. Everyone who lives long enough will go gray.
2) More than 40 percent of the U.S. population has a little gray hair by age 40, and almost 100% of people have some gray hair at 50.
3) Women in the U.S. have progressively adopted hair coloring to cover gray since the 1950’s. (Back then – the fifties --, the meager choices of hair coloring for gray created a generation of pink- and blue-haired, little old ladies. (So, it’s no wonder that only a minority of older women dyed their hair at that time!)
4) Today, hair dye products have improved and 50%+ of the U.S. women, ages 13-69, color their hair as a part of their beauty routine, and the percentage of users go up in the older age groups -- presumably because they hope to cover up their gray.

Some reasons cited for not going gray
For a majority of women, the train of thought seems to go mostly like this: We live in a culture that applauds youth and belittles old people, so why put up with that? Though aging is unquestionably natural, we don't have to like it and don’t want to appear as old as our years. We’ve heard from a multitude of sources that hair color can make us look better, and since we aren’t sure if the men in our life want a “mother, mistress or caretaker", we don’t want to take any chances. And just as we look for medicines to combat our worst menopausal symptoms, we consider wrinkles, waist-line expansion, and graying hair as morbid annoyances that need to be taken care of. With frantic hopes of looking younger, we take up diets, exercise at the gym, and buy scads of products advertised to help us slim down and shrink the ravages of time. Unfortunately, most of these efforts don’t lead to our longed-for results. But hair color is chemical, and if all your hair doesn’t fall out because of it, then you can have gray-free hair (at least most of the time, depending on your diligence).

Now, until quite recently, U. S. men didn’t seem to mind going gray, but today a growing fraction of them have started using hair color products. We have to presume that men are dyeing their hair for similar reasons that women do -- to feel younger, to have a more pleasing appearance, to not look like the oldest guy in the office, and, for those who are married, to remain on par with a younger appearing wife, or, for single men, as aid in the hunt for an attractive partner.

My take on going gray
Even though it’s been a while since I stopped coloring my hair, I do remember the reasons I did it. It was getting to be costly to buy the product at the store every 5 weeks (the time it took for me to clearly see the gray roots coming in), and there was no way that I could afford the $80 or more that it was going to cost me at (even a cheap) beauty salon.
Also, although I tried a number of hair colors brands at the supermarket in succession, I was unable to find even one that didn’t leave my hair feeling droopy and brittle. In time, I also became aware that a lot of my hair was falling out, and I developed an itchy, peeling scalp. So, it seemed to me that I had 2 choices: go gray, in a dignified way - or not, or go bald within a short time. My husband told me he actually liked gray hair and thought it would look good on me. I’m not sure whether that was his honest opinion or not, but he was sweet and supportive at the time I was making the decision.

My Mom, past this world and gone to her glory by two decades, had let her hair go gray after age 60, and I always admired her for it. Also, she had the great luck to have lovely and almost purely white hair some years before reaching age 70. In my vain wishes, I hoped that I could also have gorgeous silver locks and would rather quickly jump from what I considered the awkward salt and pepper stage to all beautiful white. (Five years later, I am reminded that the awkward stage can last a very long time for some women. Oh, well, I guess I can continue to wait and hope…)

On the downbeat side of affairs, some of my female friends and family members weren’t at all supportive. They made comments about it most likely being a mistake – that going gray makes you look older – “beyond your years.” They whispered of the specters that haunt older women about husbands leaving wives for younger gals or not looking professional (a damaging image) in the workplace. Their suggestions were for combining better dyes with a myriad of costly hair softening and strengthening products or for returning to the salon at any cost – something like it would be better to cut back on food and utilities than to cut out those trips to the hair stylist.

But, as you might imagine, I have my own opinion and I think I can back it up. So, here are my reasons for saying that gray is to way to go. (I’ll leave it up to you as to whether or not you think going gray is chic.)
-- Gray saves time and money – having a natural gray is effortless and doesn’t involve expensive products and services, thereby helping to save us from unnecessary consumerism.
--Gray celebrates our wisdom and maturity. Embracing our gray is our starting point to say that women over 50 can be attractive, strong, and happy. Most of us remember our own grannies (or, at least, if we don’t - somebody else’s grannies) as elegant old ladies. And at this time, many, if not most, female lawyers and doctors go naturally gray as they age. Hey, even Hollywood is changing somewhat on this question - what with Jamie Lee Curtis and Meryl Streep!
--Gray is healthy and eco-friendly. Hair dye box labels show a wide variety of unpronounceable chemical substances. When these are applied to the head, some of it permeates the scalp, and there are realistic fears that this may be a cause of cancer. Even if we think that not all hair color products are extraordinarily dangerous for users, few can deny that we surely harm the earth by throwing all those dyes down the drain where they concentrate in our groundwater.(We're talking about more than 100 million users, here.)
-- And finally, going gray is what you make of it. When you reach retirement, you’re undoubtedly of the age to have some very special people calling you grandma or grandpa, as the case may be. (I, for one, would like all my friends and relatives and particularly my grand daughters to see me as a healthy, mature person, who has most, if not all, of her faculties, and is prepared to grow old naturally without fear and loathing.)